家庭重要还是女朋友重要:家庭是否应该成为放弃一段恋情的理由?

导读:爱情是两个人的事儿,婚姻则是两个家庭的结合,当你对另一半的家庭不满意的时候,是否应该选择离开?

家庭重要还是女朋友重要_英语新闻

"If I can’t get along with his parents, should I marry him?" My friend Lisa is pondering on this question.

我的朋友丽莎正在考虑一个问题:“如果我不能和男朋友的父母好好相处,我应该嫁给他吗?”

After dating her boyfriend for two years, she is now standing at the crossroads of marriage. But after her boyfriend introduced her to his parents last week, she hesitated.

在和男友交往两年之后,她现在站在婚姻的十字路口上。但是在上周见过男方父母之后,她犹豫了。

"His mother seems to be a control freak. The family atmosphere is smothering and I can feel the discord within the family," said Lisa.

丽莎说道:“他母亲的控制欲很强,家庭氛围令人窒息,我能感觉到家庭内部的不和谐。”

On the other hand, her relationship is going well, and there isn’t any reason for her and her boyfriend to breakup.

但是另一方面,她的感情状况很好,没有任何理由让她和男友分手。

Some of her friends told her that the most important thing is to choose the right person, not the family. However, their words are not comforting. In Lisa’s eyes, love is a two-person thing but marriage is not. The concept of marriage suggests an alliance of two families.

一些朋友对她说,最重要的事儿是要选对人,而不是选对家庭。但是,他们的意见并不那么使人宽慰。在丽莎眼里,爱情是两个人的事儿,但是婚姻不是。婚姻意味着两个家庭的结合。

It’s impossible for her to totally avoid his family. And she can foresee their bad relationship, which she worries could become a ticking bomb in her marriage. "And it’s cruel to drag my boyfriend into a dilemma of choosing me or his family," she said.

她不可能完全避开男朋友的家庭。而她可以预见将来的糟糕关系,而她担心这会成为他们婚姻的定时炸弹。她说道:“而让我男朋友处于一个选择家庭还是选择我的两难境地是一件很残忍的事儿。”

Linda, a married friend of Lisa’s, agrees. She said she would have not married her husband if she met his mother first. She now lives under the same roof with her mother-in-law who is there to take care of her new-born baby. They have too many differences, and she does not even want to come home after work. Linda said once a baby is born, you have to depend on parents to take care of your child. Under this situation, dealing with your spouse’s parents will become a daily routine.

丽莎的一个已婚朋友琳达表示同意。据她表示,如果结婚前她先见过男朋友的母亲的话,她可能就不会和他结婚。她现在和丈夫的母亲住在同一屋檐下,后者将要照顾她即将出生的孩子。她们之间分歧很多,琳达下班之后甚至不想回家。琳达表示一旦孩子出生之后,你就必须依靠父母来照顾孩子。在这样的情况下,和配偶的父母相处就成了一项例行公事。

Also, when parents age, we are obliged to take care of parents at home. Senior-care homes aren’t a choice as sending parents away is against traditional filial piety.

同样,当父母上了年纪之后,我们就必须在家里照顾他们。高级疗养院并不是个好选择,因为将父母送走是违背传统孝道的。

"Thinking in this way, your companion’s parents definitely are an important index for marriage," said Linda.

琳达说道:“用这种方式思考,伴侣的父母肯定是婚姻的一个重要指标。”

I partly agreed with Linda. Parents are important, but what’s more important is whether your partner can handle the disputes between you and his parents.

我同意琳达的部分观点。父母的确很重要,但是更重要的是你的伴侣能否处理你和他父母之间的纠纷。

If Lisa doesn’t like her boyfriend’s parents, he needs to put in some wisdom to reconcile both sides. He should behave like "lubricating oil," avoid public arguments and improve impressions on both sides.

如果丽莎不喜欢男朋友的父母,那么他就应该用点儿智慧来协调双方。他应该表现得像“润滑油”一样,避免公开的争吵、改善双方的印象。

(来源:爱语吧)

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